Bich Ngoc speaks with Ted Engelmann, an American veteran who recently completed Wounds That Bind: Four Countries After the American-Vietnam War, a book of photographs. Thirty-seven years in the making, the project looks at the effects of the war on Vietnam, the United States and the US’s major allies, South Korea and Australia
n What impresses you most during your visits to Vietnam, 30 years after the war? Always the generosity of the people, no matter who they were. Especially when they knew I was an American War veteran, everybody has been more than giving and friendly, with a smile.
n In your visits to take pictures, what makes you upset and what makes you happy about the country? I get worried about the rapid growth that’s damaging the environment and culture. This is similar to my country. Progress seems to be equated with newness and change. There is a lot to appreciate about the past, and the ways of change are sometimes better taken slow. I am also sad to see the discrimination against the southern Vietnamese soldiers since the war. Vietnam is one country, yet there are still many internal divisions and a large population cut off from participating fully in the economy and politics because they wore a different uniform 30 years ago. For the sake of peace throughout the country, as in my own, I hope people can let go of their fear and anger at each other. What I most enjoy is the hope in the eyes of the people and the laughter.
n You are an American veteran. What made you return to Vietnam to do your photo collection? I felt such a burden of responsibility for the destruction of war just by being a small part of the process, and as an educator and photographer I felt it important to help rebuild and tell the story to our children. I make photographs and share them with American veterans, educators and students as much as I can. Returning to Vietnam many times has helped me learn many things and observe the culture.
n What can you say about Wounds That Bind? What is its content? What are your purposes for the book? The content of the book is mainly directed to help Americans. First the veterans, to help them understand visually and through stories – that was then, this is now. To respect yourself, forgive yourself and others, to never forget how this trauma came about and help make a better world for all people. To educators, I provide new information for their students. American education and our culture are still in denial about the war; what we did to ourselves and others. The results are difficult to fathom. It’s easier to forget and pretend it didn’t happen. To overcome our own national post-traumatic stress denial, we need to understand what happened and accept responsibility for the effects of the war. This project also shows the effects of the war on four countries: Vietnam, the US and our two major allies, Australia and South Korea.
n What are the most impressive pictures that you have taken in Vietnam? Can you name some of them and the circumstances under which you took them? A little boy about four years old, playing near the B-52 wing in 1989, is memorable (pictured right). I would like to find him and make a current photograph. He should be about 20-years-old now. A single woman praying in the Holy See in Tay Ninh City, with a bright crimson ao dai, alone in the great hall. Little boys with their kites lifting off on the exact location I made a photo lifting off in an airplane from the same runway 20 years before. Most of my photographs are spontaneous. Sometimes I try too hard. When I let life work its magic around me, and I see what is happening without controlling the experience, there are moments that become special to me. I hope the images chosen for the project will also have a special meaning to the viewer. The meaning is in the eye of the beholder. I wouldn’t expect their meaning to be the same as mine.
n What message do you want to convey to readers from this collection? There is hope for recovery from the trauma of war. It is an individual process and takes time. These images and words are only a piece of the process. Each person has their own story and path to a better life.
n How will you make people in Vietnam aware of your collection? When will you publish Wounds That Bind, and will you hold an exhibition? To let the Vietnamese people know about my project, I have a website (www.tedengelmann.com), and hope to bring my exhibit to Vietnam in the near future. I hope to receive support from the photography associations in Vietnam and others who feel this is a worthwhile body of work. I am looking for a home for the first time since 1985, so I can begin work on putting together my book and photo exhibit. Currently I am exploring the possibility of living and working in Nanaimo, British Columbia. I hope to publish my book as soon as possible.
n If someone asked you to tell a story about Vietnam, what would you say? The first and very telling story that comes to my mind happened on my first return trip to Vietnam, in February 1989. An elderly man was offering me tea in his house. I noticed an aging photo of a young man on the wall and asked who it was. The old man indicated through the interpreter [that] it was his son. He died in the war fighting against the Americans. I put down my teacup and felt embarrassed in his presence. I asked how he could offer me tea, knowing I was fighting during the war. His answer was like so many I have heard over the years: all those who suffered loss of their loved ones know the pain of war. He and others have had to put the pain aside in order to live. It was his hope I would be able to let go of my pain and live a good life, too.
